Racing my own race

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If you had asked me to close my eyes before the start of the race and imagine what I would be doing during my first week in the Indian Ocean, today would not have been anywhere close to my visualisation. Once again we are bereft of the big breeze to push us East, the skies have been clear and I even had my shorts back on in the middle of the day today. It's been hot.

Now I love the sun. I love to be warm and I love the huge amount of positive energy sunlight brings into our lives but the last two days it has felt like my race has been on pause. I have struggled along at a walking pace, stuck in my own little weather vacuum while the boats ahead and the boats behind all make up their miles in their own weather systems. I feel like I am in a bubble, almost suspended from racing. I am still doing everything I can to move Medallia forwards and to pick the right route but when there is no more than 10 knots of wind on offer I seem to be proceeding around the world at a crawl.

I know I am not alone, the whole fleet is having a hard time with weather systems not quite as we had hoped and it would be so easy to get frustrated; progress is slow, hopes for quick times to the finish and new records are in the balance and there is so much more of the Southern Ocean to sail.

As ever I am trying to use my time wisely. Today I made some sail repairs, taking out each one of my downwind sails, inspecting them for damage, adjusting leechlines, repacking them with care. I dropped the mainsail and put patches on a couple of areas I had noticed were being rubbed by the lazy jacks. There is always enough to do, and I have tried to make it my objective for Medallia to be in the best form when the breeze does arrive so we can make the most of every extra knot of wind with no concerns.

Now our pack has split up, just Didac and I are left together. The distance between us goes up and down and I am needing to adjust my focus between pacing with him and the big picture ahead. Both yesterday and today I lost miles while I was working. Having to take sails down and sail a sub-optimal course to finish a job and then just the act of  being focussed on getting a job done rather than the sailing inevitably has an impact on my speed. But I need to keep re-confirming with myself that this is an investment in the future; it is necessary, and a small loss now is a small price to pay.

The larger race has now become fragmented. The first half of the fleet are in a different world to me. They are 2500 miles ahead. When I download my weather forecasts, I do not select an area big enough to even see what sort of conditions they are in, there are at least three weather systems between me and Charlie in the lead. A little in front of us by just over 200 miles are four boats; three have foils, one is a 2007 boat. In reality I should not be able to catch these boats but I am watching them. It's good to have a relative target, even to stop the rot a little would be a good goal.

Then there is the pack behind... they are currently hooked into a nice system driving them East while I sit here in my shorts, plodding forwards. It makes me nervous. I look at the weather over and again, should I be somewhere different on the track, can I keep pace with those behind, the answer is no. We are all racing in our own space and time. We do not have the same conditions but we all have to make the most of what we have. Yes, I wish I had more wind but wishing is not a well-recognised established tactic for success. I will keep cool, I will accept the conditions I have and make best use of them whatever that looks like. This race is not just about speed, it's about strength, knowledge, discipline and keeping your cool. There are many, many ocean miles to come, many opportunities, many pitfalls I just need to be ready to take them on.